29 January 2012

WE ARE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER: THE POWER OF TRUE CONNECTION


Lately, I have been doing a lot of yoga. I get myself to class once or twice a week and I also practice at home. I have been dabbling in and out of yoga since I was 18. But something has just been pulling me to this beautiful practice lately. It has been calling at me to get myself there. To lay still and simply listen. There is definitely something larger than me right now that knows I need it. 

I love my teacher. At the start and end of my class she always shares some wise words, an inspirational message or some beautiful insights. I have found that in each class, her words have resonated with me,  so deeply. It is as if I am being told exactly what I need to hear.

My most recent class was no different. As I lay there in savasana, her words washed over me. She finished the class with this simple message...


"We are all one. We are all in this together"


So simple. Yet so profound.

+ We are all one -- We are all the same. We are all made of the same stuff. Whether we believe it or not, we all go through similar challenges, similar joys and similar experiences. We are not as different as we may think we are.

+ We are all in this together -- This journey. This life. This process. We are all here, just doing the best we can. We all want the same thing. Happiness. Peace. Love. Fulfilment. We are all on the path just trying to carve out a life that makes our heart sing.

Unfortunately, as a society, I think we have forgotten and completely lost touch with this simple truth.


OUR SOCIETY OF SEPARATENESS

I felt deeply inspired to expand on this teaching in a blog post because I think it is a huge one.

We live in a world where there is a lot of separateness, disconnect and competition. There is war, fighting and hatred. There is racism, sexism and terrorism. There is so much you against me, and us against them. 

In the workplace, we compete against each other for promotions and pay rises. Our schools breed rivalry as we work and struggle to be better than our peers.  Or politicians fight against each other for right and wrong. As women, we judge and evaluate our fellow sisters so that we can feel superior. On the roads we cut in, cut off and zig zag through traffic in the effort to get ahead of another.

All you have to do is listen to the news and you will hear stories of people against people. You against me. Us against them.

We have been taught to be so focused on ourselves. Our wants. Our desires. Our need to be better, faster, stronger, more successful etc. We have forgotten the most beautiful and powerful truth of why we are really here.

We are here to connect. We are here to love. We are here to serve. We are here to let go of all the crap that we think makes us different, and remember that we are all one. We are all the same.


CREATING CONNECTEDNESS

Creating true connection, starts with each of us as individuals. As we each change ourselves, who we are being, and how we are thinking, gradually the whole world will begin to change. It all starts with us. All great change, starts within us.


+ CONNECT WITH YOURSELF
To truly connect with another being, we first have to master the ability to connect with ourselves. I believe this is the first step.

Someone who does not know who they are, and does not feel secure in themselves, is much more likely to want to make others feel smaller in an attempt to make themselves feel bigger. This comes from a place of insecurity, separateness and fear. However, someone who is deeply connected with a strong sense of self and feels confident and certain about themselves, will feel comfortable to lift others up and see them become their best.

Take some time to really get to know yourself. Get familiar with your good and bad, your positives and negatives, your strengths and weaknesses. Through getting to know yourself you will see that we are actually not that different from each other. When you are comfortable with your own flaws, you will be less critical and aware of the apparent flaws in others.


+ BE VULNERABLE 
You cannot truly connect with another human being unless you are willing to be vulnerable. When we allow other people to see who we really are, good and bad, it tears down the walls that separate us. 

Anytime we are living in a false sense of self, protecting ourselves with distance and superiority, we make it impossible for anyone to get close to us. We must be willing to be raw, real, authentic with warts and all exposed. Doing this removes competition. It eliminates you vs. me. It creates a space of truth and oneness and allows two people to see each other for who they really are.


+REFRAIN FROM JUDGEMENT 
"Don't judge a man until you've walked two moons in his moccasins" -- Sharon Creech. 

How often do you judge another person? Label their actions as good or bad? Pass an opinion on who they are or what they have done? By doing this you are separating yourself and trying to give off the false impression that you are perfect. 

When you remember that we are all one, and we are all in this together, then the need to judge another falls away. We can empathise and understand that the other person is just doing the best they can. When we can acknowledge that we too, have made mistakes and done things we are not proud of, we can let other people off the hook when they do it too.


+ SERVE 
There is no better way to connect with another person, than being of service. To do this you have to get over yourself and make someone else's needs a priority. When you are of service, what you want for yourself does not matter. You are simply there to support and enable another person to get what they need. Being of service is simply about helping another. 

To do this you must be humble, generous, loving and kind. It may be as simple as listening to a friend when they are in need, letting someone else take a seat on the bus, doing a favour, lending a helping hand, volunteering your time, giving away something you own. 

Whatever it is, it is not about you. You have no hidden agenda. You are not afraid about anyone else becoming better than you, or getting more than you. You simply know that you are equal with this person, and that by serving them, you are in essence serving yourself.

26 January 2012

CURIOSITY: THE PERFECT ANTIDOTE TO FEAR


GUEST POST:  WRITTEN BY BRIDGET THOMPSON
Read the original post here


"The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity" -- Ellen Parr

"Replacing judgement with curiosity is a key element in becoming unstuck" -- Francie White


CURIOSITY IS...

+ A state in which you want to learn more about something
+ An emotion related to inquisitive behaviour
+ The tendency to ask questions, investigate or explore
+ The desire to know what is happening or has happened

It is the 'cure' for boredom, as in the quote above. It is also a cure for anxiety, "stuck"-ness and feeling overwhelmed. It focuses attention on the subject of the curiosity.

When we are anxious about the unknown, it is useful to focus our attention on what we do know. We can do this using curiosity.


CURIOSITY CAN SOOTHE FEAR

Shifting in to a curious state has the effect of pulling apart the elements that contribute to anxiety or "stuck"-ness or feelings of overwhelm, thereby reducing those emotions.

Fear and curiosity cannot exist together. Curiosity is absent when we are overwhelmed with anxiety or fear. Conversely, when we engage our inquisitive nature, fear rarely comes up.

Our natural curiosity comes out when we encounter something of interest to us.

It can be challenging to tap back in to curiosity periodically when some thing is familiar to us eg: a person, a place, a feeling etc. We may assume we know everything about this thing/person/emotions, so we miss out on discovering completely new elements and perspectives on that thing/person/emotion.

There is always more to discover.

If we stay OPEN, CURIOUS, UNASSUMING, everything in life that may feel boring or dull can become completely NEW and WONDROUS again.

Shift back over to that place of not knowing; of pure curiosity. Inquisition.


HOW TO HARNESS CURIOSITY TO OVERCOME FEAR

+ BE LIKE A CHILD
Consider a child.

They constantly ask questions, unashamedly seek answers. They don't know a lot and are not afraid to admit that. Consequently their world remains EXCITING, STIMULATING and FASCINATING. They do not get caught up in FEARS. Instead, they are always CURIOUS.

Sometimes we are ambivalent about making the changes we know will serve us, and so we get stuck.

Often we do not know what keeps us stuck. Change can slowly emerge only when we choose to actually look at the different elements of our fear or our ambivalence.

Exactly WHAT IS IT we are afraid of? Explore. Be curious.

We do not need to worry about "fixing" or "making better". Just explore what is lurking there.


+ ACCEPT WHAT IS
Curiosity can also have the effect of encouraging acceptance of what is.

A great way to change behaviours that we find problematic is to accept the behaviour and, with open curiosity, observe it to learn what drives, triggers and reasons are behind it.


+ ASK THE RIGHT QUESTIONS
We can adjust our self talk, thoughts and language to encourage curiosity.

In areas we feel rigidly stuck in terms of our perspective, we can try reframing the situation.

For example
+ "I wonder..."
+ "Imagine..."
+ "Hmm, that makes me curious about.."
+ "Can I explore this more?"

Change is least likely to happen when someone is feeling judged or is judging themselves.

"Why" questions are usually heard as a judgement. Even when our questions come from genuine curiosity, sub consciously we still feel these as judgement. We when re-word our questions to "How..." and "What..." questions, our curiosity is elicited

Practice your curiosity today and observe the difference it makes.

Curiosity is free of JUDGEMENT, FEAR and ANXIETY

Curiosity is purely OPEN, INNOCENT and GENUINELY interested

It will truly change the everyday experience of your life, yourself, others and situations.


ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Bridget is an accredited practicing dietitian (APD) with a special interest and passion for transforming lives. Having being an overweight and bullied child herself, Bridget understands only too well how excess weight can impact on the quality of a person’s life. 


Read more from Bridget on her New Leaf Nutrition website and blog. Or connect on Facebook and Twitter

23 January 2012

THE ART OF AUTHENTIC LIVING: HOW TO LIVE AND BREATHE YOUR TRUTH


Today's post is about being-ness. It is about learning how to be the person you truly are. It is about creating your self and your life from the inside out.

A key aspect of this is authenticity. Being your authentic self. Living your authentic life. To me, this means: find out who you are, and then live it and breathe it.

"What does it mean to live authentically? Living authentically is what you're doing when you find congruence between your inner world: your feelings, values, gifts, needs, spirituality, and passions, and your outer world: your job, relationships, home, and community. When you live an authentic life, these things support and synergize each other" --Susan Piver

For years, I read about the practice of living authentically, yet I never really experienced it. I knew it as a concept. An idea. But embodying authenticity and stepping 100% totally and utterly in to your truth, is a completely different experience. 

I grasped fleeting moments of authenticity when I would find myself immersed in a project, in an area of passion or in a creative task. I felt aligned. I felt like I was doing exactly what I needed to be doing in this moment. I felt clear headed and centred. It was like I was exactly where I needed to be.

While I caught the occasional glimpse of authenticity, living these principles as my daily truth felt impossible. For so long, I felt like I knew who I was on the inside, but I never felt that it was reflected on the outside in my day to day life. 

It has not been until recently that I have actually began to walk my talk. To live and breathe my truth. To be who I really am. For me, living authentically means showing the world who I know I am and ensuring that every decision, every action, every word is aligned with that.

Since I have been doing this I have been feeling new emotions, experiencing magic, witnessing synchronicities. Life has a new level of flow. It has purpose and meaning. I have a goal that feels greater than I will ever be.


WHO DO YOU WANT TO BE IN THE WORLD?

Many of us are not motivated by the idea of living an authentic life and discovering our true selves. Rather we are happy to live a life that bring us superficial satisfaction, fleeting feelings of pleasure, and the love and approval of others. We play a safe game. We do what we think is right. We follow the pack. We keep ourselves comfortable. 

We are very often conditioned to live this way. We are taught who we need to be in order to get love, or what we need to do to get praise. We consequently throw our own inner guidance out the window and replace it with the guidance of others. We lose touch with what we really want for ourselves. We forget who we were really born to be.

To live an authentic life we have to be willing to let all of this go. We have to let go of our old ways of being. An authentic life is about unlearning all the messages you have received from your family, your peers, your environment, and relearning your truth. It is about discovering who you really are.


WHAT ARE THE QUALITIES OF AN AUTHENTIC LIFE?

+ Embodying your truth: You live so completely and utterly in line with your truth, that you never doubt yourself. You honour and trust yourself so completely that you can follow what is right for you whether or not other people like it or agree with it.

+ Living from your heart space: This means that everything you do is motivated by love and comes from a space of love. Your heart is what guides you. You follow your bliss.You can not be authentic if fear is running your life.

+ Being on purpose: You know exactly what you are meant to be doing with your life, and you are doing it. You are connected to a larger meaning in your life rather than the simple day in and day out actions of surviving. You are here to serve.

+ Intuition: You are connected to your inner self. You have an inner awareness. You can connect with your body, your soul and your self, and hear the guidance that comes from the higher part of you. You act on your inspiration.

+ Knowing yourself: You have a beautiful and keen self awareness. You are willing to peel back the layers of your self and discover what is who you really are and what is not. You are comfortable getting familiar with the wonderful aspects of yourself, as well as the deep, dark and not so nice aspects.

+ Courage: You have such a commitment to your authentic life that you are willing to do whatever it takes. Overcome any fear. Triumph over any challenge. Take any risk. 


HOW TO LIVE MORE AUTHENTICALLY

+ Identify your passions: Do you know what you are passionate about? Honestly. Do you know what excites you, inspires you and ignites your little heart? To live authentically, you have to be living in line with your passion. So, if you do not know what you are passionate about I suggest you sit down and start to find out. Get out of your head, listen to your heart and hear what it is telling you.

+ Journal: Journalling is a fantastic tool to help unveil your passions. Start by simply sitting down and free writing, without judgement. Write lists about all the things you love to do. Write about your ideal life. What would be the most amazing way you could spend each day of your life? What are those things that you do, where time just passes? What makes you come alive?

+ Become self-aware: Self awareness is a undervalued principle. Yet, it is the first step to creating beautiful and powerful change in your life. Start to get curious about yourself. What are your beliefs? What are your values? How have you become the person you are? Take some time to introspect. What decisions have shaped your life? What experiences have defined your life? It is impossible to live an authentic life, if you do not know who you are.

+ Choose love: Living authentically will require you to relinquish all of the fear based thinking you have been indulging in. You must choose to love yourself and make decisions based on what you love. You will be required to step out in to the world and in order to do so you will have to let go of the fear that has been keeping you small. Think in loving, support and limitless ways rather than fearful, negative and limited ways.

+ Take inspired action: As you start to connect with your authentic self, you will realise it is not enough to simply know who you are. You have to experience who you are. This means taking new actions and creating experiences in the outer world that match who you are. As you connect with yourself you will feel inspired to act in new ways. It will be these new actions that will begin to define yourself in a new way and change how you are living your life.

+ Let go of others opinions: You are going to have to give up on putting other peoples opinions before your own. You will have to stop worrying about what other people will think. You cannot live an authentic life if you are continuously trying to mould yourself to the preferences of others. To play a big, true, real life you must march to the beat of your own drum and know that the people who truly love you will you support you no matter what.

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind" -- Dr Seuss


So, over to you! I would love to hear more about your journey...
+ Do you feel you are living an authentic life?
+ If so, what practices have you used to help get you there?
+ If not, what do you need to do to get you there?

19 January 2012

PERFECT DAY TIP #3: EAT KALE (A NUTRITIOUS + DETOXIFYING SUPER VEG!)

Kale. It is a wonder vegetable. In fact, it changed my life. This puppy is one of the healthiest vegetables on the planet, and since I began eating it my health has totally transformed. 

I first came across kale through my dear friend Nicci from Miss Organic. She would deliver a massive bunch of this curly-leafed green to me each week. For a while there, I was not quite sure what to do with it. I thought it was pretty, and that it looked super healthy, but I had no idea how to prepare it or eat it. After getting a few tips, doing a lot of googling, and plenty of trial and error I was able to develop a repertoire of ways to prepare it, and I have since grown to love this little vegetable.

SO WHAT IS SO GREAT ABOUT KALE?

+ Kale is extremely high in Vitamin K, Vitamin C and Vitamin A
+ It is packed with fibre and antioxidants
+ It also contains calcium, iron and B1, B2 and B6
+ Due to the high vitamin K content it has a wonderful anti inflammatory effect on the body
+ The amazing phytonutrients in this pretty plant help to prevent cancer
+ It is full of nutritious minerals and creates has an alkalising effect on your body

HERE IS HOW I EAT KALE!


I JUICE IT...




This is my kale before I juiced it up! This combo has kale, cucumber, lemon and ginger. Just a word of warning with this one - the flavour of kale can be quite intense due to the high chlorophyll content. So, if you are a beginner in the world of juicing kale, I highly recommend you add in an apple or 2 until you get used to the flavour. It has taken me quite a long time of kale juice drinking to work up to having without fruit.


I SAUTE IT...

Rip the leaves off the stem and cut it in to bite size pieces. Saute in a little bit of coconut oil (or olive oil if you prefer) until it has wilted. Then whisk together a couple of eggs and pour over the top. Cook it all together until the eggs are done and then serve on some yummy gluten free bread. 


I CHOP IT...

Rip the leaves off the stem and then cut the leaves up in to bite size pieces. Mix it in with some other lettuce leaves or baby spinach and top with avocado! Then use it as a side accompaniment to any dish you want!


I STIR IT THROUGH...

Kale is delicious when it is mixed in with lots of other yummy + healthy superfoods as well. This dish blends together my 3 favourite things - kale, quinoa and avocado! I simply cooked up the quinoa and while it was still warm I stirred through through the kale and then topped it with avocado and a boiled egg. Delish!


I BLEND IT...





Add kale to a fruit smoothie (minus the milk) and blend it up! You do not have to make yours as green as this. It is fine to just add in a handful of kale leaves with a banana or mango. I also like to add in some superfoods like goji berries, chia seeds, maca powder or coconut!


WANT MORE KALE RECIPE IDEAS?

Here are some recipes from other kale lovers...

+ Over at My New Roots, check out these amazing looking Kale Chips

+ The oh so inspiring Linda Wagner shows you how to eat kale raw with her favourite salad

+ Sarah Wilson has a great range of kale recipes here including a kale and olive gluten free pasta!

+ Gina from Choosing Raw demonstrates how to make a yummy hummus and kale wrap

+ Tom and Ali from Nourishing Meals have an amazing looking harvest green smoothie

So, over to you...

+ Are you a kale lover?
+ What is your favourite way to eat it?

17 January 2012

QUIT YOUR FUTURE TRIPPING! : HOW TO LOVE YOUR 'NOW'

With all this new year goal setting flying around, I am finding myself getting caught up in a severe case of future tripping. My mind is completely overwhelmed with all of my future goals, and as a result it is taking me away from simply enjoying this delicious present moment. 

I have a bit of the grass is greener mentality. The grass over there seems so luscious and beautiful and as a result it makes the grass here look totally dull and boring.

Sure, there is nothing wrong with feeling super psyched about all the exciting things you want to manifest this year. However, trouble arises when you find that your future fantasising leads you to feel totally and utterly dissatisfied with where you are now.

This pretty much sums up exactly what is happening to me. Let's see if you can relate....

(above: my new affirmation!!)

MY FUTURE TRIPPING WOES

At the moment I have a day job. I enjoy my job. There is nothing wrong with it. However I do not love my job. The main aim of this job at the moment is to pay the bills so that I can support myself in my transition to start up my own business. Each day after work, I literally rush home so that I can start work on what I am really passionate about. In the evenings after a long day at the office, I do not watch tv or sit on the couch. I work. I write on my blog. I work with coaching clients. I study. I connect with my like minded peeps in the world wide web. I meditate. I read. I brainstorm about my future plans and I design and develop all the exciting components of my dream job. And I love it.

Basically outside of work, I do what I love. And I love it so much that sometimes I cannot sleep. And then, I wake up and I go back to my reality and it feels like a slap in the face. In comparison to where I want to be, where I am now seems totally boring and uninspiring.

So, herein lies my problem. How do we remain happy day in day out with where we are in our lives, while also allowing ourselves to get ridiculously caught up in all the delicious details of our future?

The answer? 

We have to learn to love our NOW, while at the same time being excited about what is coming

LOVE YOUR NOW

This is the trick. You have to find a way to love, enjoy, appreciate and adore everything about where you are now and what you have now, while you wait for all your awesome future stuff to come to you.

This requires a delicate balancing act. It is a balance between...

Appreciating everything you already have + Loving the present moment + Making every day the best it can be 

While also...

Focusing on the end goal you are working towards + Dedicating huge amounts of your physical and mental energy to your future outcome +  Feeling super excited and eager about where you are going

Now you get why it can be challenging, huh!

HOW ON EARTH DO I LOVE MY NOW? (I hear you ask!)

I want to share with you what I do to bring myself back to the present moment. This stuff is tried and tested and it really helps. So if you too have a case of the future trips, try out these hot tips...

+ Open your eyes: Personally, when I future trip, I am 100% percent stuck in my head. Often I find myself getting quite lost in the future world in my head. Life becomes one big daydream. When this happens I stop, open my eyes, and focus on something in my immediate environment. Start to actually look at what is around you and in front of you. We miss so much beauty and magic that is right in front of us when we are in our heads 

+ Make peace with where you are: Stop resisting it. Stop complaining about it. Stop noticing all the things wrong with it. Simply accept it. This is your reality in this moment. Make peace with it.

+ Remember, life is a journey: Yes, it sounds cliche but it is actually true. There is so much involved in the journey you are taking as you move towards what you want. Life is not purely about getting things. It is about who we become in the process. The reason things take time, is because we first need to go through the process of becoming the person we need to be in order to be able to handle what we are getting. 

+ Find the positives: When we are unhappy in a situation, the main reason is because we are focusing on all the things we do not like about it. I have no doubt that if there is an area of your life that you are wanting to change or move away from, you spend most of your time thinking about what is wrong with it, rather than what is right. True? So, start finding the positives. Start looking for what is great about where you are. Trust me, there are things. Search for them. The more you focus on the positives, the more positive your situation will become.

+ Learn a little patience:  In this day and age, we all want everything at the click of a finger. We are no longer prepared to wait. Patience, as a quality, is actually a beautiful skill to practice. The gift of being patient is that it makes you slow down. We are all so rushed these days. But having to wait for something, makes you stop. You are forced to stop and wait in a situation where you would normally trying to make things happen as fast as possible. Have a little faith in the divine timing that is going on, and practice a wee bit of patience.

So, over to you! I want to know...

+ What area of your life are you future tripping in?
+ What practices do you use to help you love your now?

15 January 2012

LOVING ME, LOVING YOU: IT IS ALL ABOUT RADICAL SELF LOVE!


GUEST POST: WRITTEN BY VIENDA MARIA
Read the original post here

"You must love yourself before you love another. By accepting yourself and fully being what you are, your simple presence can make others happy" -- Unknown

It is my understanding, from what I have observed, experienced and learnt about life so far, that all negative, unhappy, unkind, insensitive thoughts, words and actions stem from a lack of love. And in order to create more love in our lives, firstly we must start with loving ourselves.

RADICAL SELF LOVE
I love the term radical self love, which I believe was coined by Gala Darling, as it so eloquently encompasses exactly what we must feel for ourselves. Radical self love is knowing, understanding and accepting oneself fully. It means that we allow ourselves to be exactly who we are, reverie in it even. We support ourselves without question and stop criticising ourselves. We stop the banal chatter in our minds and drop the beliefs that we are underserving, unloveable or unworthy of all the good we would like in our lives.

Radical self love means that you know that, by the mere fact that you exist, you are worthy of love, of success, of wealth, of friendship, of beauty, of safety, of fun, of anything and everything that you dream of, and aspire to be...

Why is self love so important? Because what you feel, think and believe about yourself is exactly what you get. If you think you are wonderful, unique and deserving of the best, that is what you will get. If you believe that you are unworthy, unlucky, and always finish last, then that is what you will get.

WHAT IS IT THAT YOU WANT?
Countless books have been written on this topic and the one that I continuously recommend is by Louise Hay, called, You Can Heal Your Life. Not only does Louise tenaciously describe how and why radical self love is so important, she also gives and entire step by step guideline on how to change your thoughts and belief patterns. One of my favourite parts of her book no less, is that back pages which explain common physical ailments that are reflected and can be changed by our thought processes.

Not only is self love important as a realm of creating your own Universe, it is important in the relationships you create with others. No one will ever be able to love you more than you love yourself, so you must love yourself first in order to be able to let others love you. And the more you love yourself, the easier it is to love others. Suddenly your world opens up into a myriad of magic and compassion, and anything and everything becomes possible for you.

"I'll tell you, the more I think, the more I feel that there is nothing more truly artistic than to love people" -- Vincent Van Gogh

HOW TO PRACTICE SELF LOVE
The best way I can think of how to describe how to practice self love, is to treat yourself as you would your best friend. Somehow, somewhere, we have learnt to put ourselves last, to put up with less than we would like or expect. So start pretending you are someone external to yourself, someone you truly love and admire, and treat yourself as so. 

Would you allow your best friend to stay in a relationship that is obviously detrimental to them? No! Would you allow your best friend to behave in ways that makes them sick, sad, tired or unhealthy? No! Would you allow your best friend to be in situations or with people that made them feel bad? NO!! So, why would you allow these things in your life?

Now is the perfect time to make those changes. Every day show yourself how much you love yourself, by protecting yourself, nourishing yourself, pampering yourself and giving yourself the best that you can. Start thinking positive thoughts about yourself and your body. Compliment yourself and watch in awe how the world around you begins to change to reflect your new perspective.


ABOUT THE AUTHOR

This post was written by Vienda Maria. Vienda is a philosophising wordsmith and life coach who lights up when she helps others realise their full potential. Want to know more? You can read more from Vienda Maria here, or connect on Facebook and Twitter.



11 January 2012

PERFECT DAY TIP #2 : EXERCISE AT SUNRISE

This is the second post in the Perfect Day Tip Series. If you missed the first post, you can read it here.

Up until 6 months ago I was not a morning exercise person. Not at all. In fact, I had a massive resistance to the idea of exercising in the mornings and I had a whole bag full of excuses about why I could not do it. 

Although I had a pretty consistent fitness routine in the afternoons, I found that when life got busy or I got tired, this was the first thing to get the chop. So, to overcome my "I'm too busy" sabotage strategy, I thought it would be a great idea to get up early and squeeze in my exercise before work. 

For months, I really wanted to start to exercise in the mornings. I would think about it, set goals around it, and try to force myself to wake up for it, but it never happened. I always had so many valid  reasons why I couldn't - too tired... not enough time... it's too hard... too cold... too hungry...blah blah....







(above: a pic from one of my morning runs)

SO WHAT CHANGED?

Fast forward to now, and I pretty much never exercise in the afternoons anymore. Why? Because I love doing it the mornings so much!

So, want to know how I did it? Want to know how I changed myself from a 'chronic morning exercise procrastinator' to someone who jumps out of bed at 5am ready to go?

Well, I'll tell you!

HERE ARE MY HOT TO TROT, MORNING EXERCISE TIPS...

+ DECIDE
A lot of people like the idea of exercising in the mornings, but actually getting their butt out of bed and doing it is a whole other story. I clearly remember the evening I actually decided I was going to do this. I was totally committed. 

Before that it was just kind of a wishy washy desire. Once I decided it was going to happen, I became completely dedicated to doing whatever it took to make it happen. 

+ PLAN
Before I did anything, I started by planning everything that I would need to do to get it happening (trust me, you will be waaay too disorientated in the morning to try to plan any of it then!)

What to plan...
+ What time you will get up
+ What time you will get to the gym/park etc for your exercise
+ How long you will exercise for and what you will do
+ What time you will finish 
+ How long you will need to get ready for work 


+ PREPARE
Before exercising in the mornings, I would prepare everything I needed the night before. 

What to prepare...
+ Your clothes, shoes, and accessories (eg: ipod, hat)
+ Your gym bag 
+ Your food for the next day* 

*Now this is completely up to you. Personally, I was often in a bit of a rush to get ready for work, and I wanted to make sure I had healthy food after my workout. So I whipped my food up the night before.


+ CREATE A HABIT
I wanted to create this whole morning exercise thing, as a new habit for myself. I wanted it to become something I did easily. For me personally, I knew that if I only did this every now and then, I could easily fall back in to procrastinating on it and using the same old excuses. To succeed, I knew I had to make this part of my daily routine.

To create a rock solid habit..
+ Do it everyday (except Sunday mornings of course!)
+ Wake up at the same time everyday
+ Do it in a similar way everyday


STILL NOT CONVINCED? 

Well, maybe this will inspire you...

SOME OF THE (MANY) BENEFITS OF MORNING EXERCISE INCLUDE..

+ You get to revel in that amazing post-exercise-buzz all day long
+ It gives your metabolism an amazing kick-start
+ You can enjoy everything you eat even more because you know you have totally earned it
Your exercise is over and done with, so you do not need to think about it for the rest of the day
+ You will feel super proud of yourself
+ You will have a rockin' hot sexy body to show off as a result! What better reason is there than that?


So, over to you! Tell me...

+ What is your exercise routine?
+ Are you a morning exercise lover?

09 January 2012

DOING TOO MUCH? : WHY LEARNING TO 'BE' IS YOUR KEY TO SUCCESS


GUEST POST: WRITTEN BY GABRIELLE AITKEN

"In the being the doing is done" -- Cass Phelps

Why is it that we feel like we have to be "doing" in order to be achieving?" I've lived much of my life this way; either rushing around like a madwoman on a mission to achieve this goal or that; or on the very rare occasion (such as when on holiday, in the instance of illness or just due to pure exhaustion), feeling guilty for not rushing around like a madwoman on a mission.

It's almost like, from the moment I popped out into the world in this lifetime, I had the urge to do, do, do. Through much self-analysis I have several theories as to why this is the case, which I won't bore you with. Suffice to say, for as long as I can consciously remember, and even going back beyond conscious memory as recounted by my parents, I have been on a mission to do this, that or the other.

ARE YOU DO-ING TOO MUCH?
I was never one of those kids who was content in front of the television for hours on end. I had to be doing something productive, from sending new Barbie concepts to Mattel, to writing and illustrating story books, to studying to get straight A's. As I got older it was running marathons and half marathon triathlons, studying an MBA, climbing the corporate ladder, starting a business...

There is absolutely nothing wrong with such pursuits per se, and I am still a believer that, generally speaking, one's time is probably better spent somewhere other than watching mindless television for hours on end (although I have come to appreciate that this too can have it's time and place). It's when we use such goals and pursuits to define our sense of self that we start to enter risky territory.

For many years, I have started the New Year with a list of goals that I plan to accomplish in the year ahead; a checklist for living my life by. And then I've applied the ferocity of a bat out of hell to tick them all off by the year end. What's more my sense of accomplishment and self-worth has been directly proportional to what I have or haven't achieved in any given year.

THE POWER OF BEING-NESS
Somewhere along the way I seem to have missed the lesson on how to 'be'.  In actual fact, I think that as western society, we have long forgotten the simple art of being; of allowing ourselves the time and space to connect with our inner selves and bask in our inner beauty. We tend to define ourselves by what we do, not simply by who we are when we strip our roles and accomplishments away.

The New Year, I have not sent any goals ("shock horror" I hear those who know me gasp). Instead, my new philosophy is "inspired being".  Don't get me wrong. I don't intend to sit on my butt and do nothing all year. However, over the last 12 months I have been learning that much to my amazement and dismay, to quote Cass Phelps, "in the being the doing is done"

In other words, if we give ourselves the rest, time and space, we can open ourselves up to tune in to the magic of the Universe. We move from a state of "pushing to achieve" to "allowing" our lives to flow with ease...and ironically can actually achieve a whole lot more in the process. What's more, the things that we do achieve are more likely to be aligned with our soul purpose and create a deeper sense of fulfilment and satisfaction.

By spending time each day journaling, in meditation, walking in nature, resting and simply sitting and being (sans TV) - all things that I would have once considered lazy and a hindrance to my pursuit of "more important" goals - we can unleash out inner creativity and inspiration, and generate the impetus to effortlessly conceive and complete whole projects or works of art in record time. In a state of inspired being it no longer feels like we have to work hard to achieve our goals, it simply flows out of us. 

Why didn't I get onto this sooner?!! I finally think I'm getting the hang of what it means to be a human being rather than a human doing!

ABOUT THE AUTHOR


This post was written by Gabrielle Aitken, Inner Beauty Stylist and inspirer of Appreciation, Respect and Love (a.k.a Aprelo). Want to know more? You can read more from Aprelo here, or connect on Facebook and Twitter.

08 January 2012

PERFECT DAY TIP #1: BUILD YOUR MEDITATION MUSCLE

I don't know about you, but I am totally and utterly psyched for 2012. I think this is going to be a rocking year and I can definitely feel an electric energy in the air already.

For me, this is a year of many new beginnings. It is the year that I will be following my heart, letting go of what is familiar and embracing a life full of daring moments. I am stepping up and playing full out and I am willing to do whatever it takes to make my dreams a reality.

So, what does this mean for a life of perfect days? Well, I also have a lot planned for this little blog of mine, so watch this space! Firstly, if you have not yet noticed, the blog has undergone a new year makeover. I hope you enjoy the brighter colours and new layout.

This year, I will be bringing you a new energy, a fresh approach and more content, more frequently. You will still get your usual dose of inspiration + wisdom + tips for a wonderful life. But it will now come to you in some different and exciting ways.

You will also be hearing from other people, rather than just me. I have lined up a handful of fantastic contributors who will be bringing you inspiring and thought provoking content to help you make 2012 your best year yet.

So, here is your first sneak peak. This is my new series of posts which will become a regular segment on the blog: PERFECT DAY TIPS.

Seeing this blog is all about living a life of perfect days, I thought why not create a series of posts full of tips to create your most beautiful and perfect day. I will be sharing photos, advice, recommendations as well as practices that I use in my own life to make each day, the best day possible.

Some of these tips may resonate with you, and some may not. But each of them are there to be tried, tested and explored. They are practices that I know work for me, and that I hope will work for you too.

So, without further adieu, here is the first tip for you...

PERFECT DAY TIP #1: BUILD YOUR MEDITATION MUSCLE





































A lot of people encounter a bit of a block when it comes to meditation. Many people feel that they cannot possibly sit still for even a few minutes. Or even if they can sit, they find it impossible to quiet or slow their mind enough to actually meditate.

Here is the deal: meditation is not about being perfect. It is simply about creating some time and space for yourself.

People also often wonder if they are doing it right. Or they say "how will I know that I am actually meditating?" Again, the point of meditation is not to adhere to any particular method and there is not right or wrong way.

THE PURPOSE OF MEDITATION IS TO:
+ Slow your mind
+ Reconnect with your body
+ Become aware of your breathing
+ Create quietness
+ Embrace stillness
+ Detach from your thoughts

HOW TO BUILD YOUR MEDITATION MUSCLE:
+ Practice: Simply start by making time to sit in quietness for 5 minutes each day. Some good times to do it are in the morning after you wake up or before bed. Do not worry if your mind is whirling at a thousand miles an hour. Just start by building the habit of sitting in stillness each day.
+ Use guided meditations: I love to use guided meditations with music and some audio as I find it easiest to slow my mind when I have something to focus on. I use Gabrielle Bernstein's meditations (see pic above) which you can download them here.
+ Focus on your breath: As you are meditating you will likely catch yourself getting caught up in your thoughts. If this happens just gently bring your attention back to your breathing. Put your attention on the sensation of air coming in and out of your nose, or of your belly moving in and out.
+ Gradually increase your time: Once you feel comfortable sitting for 5 minutes, try sitting for 10. Then once you a comfortable with 10, sit for 15. Like any new habit, it takes practice. But if you can persevere you will find that over time it will become much easier.

So, let me know how you go! I would love to hear your experiences. 

+ Do you have a regular meditation practice?
+ What methods/techniques do you use to help you?

05 January 2012

NEW YEAR, NEW YOU!: 5 JUICY STEPS TO ACHIEVING YOUR 2012 GOALS


1. REFLECT 
If you have not yet had a chance to reflect on 2011, then I suggest to make yourself a cuppa, get comfy, and do it. Everybody has a different method that they use to reflect. Personally, I like to journal. Yet, some people would rather just review things in their mind. It is totally up to you how you do it, but it is definitely a must before you sit down to work on your new years goals.

Think back over 2011 and ask yourself these questions

+ What did I achieve?
+ What were the highlights?
+ What am I most proud of?
+ What is my biggest learning?
+ How did I grow and/or change?
+ What would I have done differently?
+ What did I not achieve in 2011, that I want to achieve in 2012?

This exercise not only makes you remember all the fantastic things you have experienced and created throughout the past year, but it also helps you get clarity on where you are now, and how you want to move forward from here.


2. SET S.M.A.R.T GOALS
I was having a conversation with my boyfriend the other day about our goals for 2012, and I realised something. I realised that not many people know how to really write a goal. You ability to achieve your goals will be compromised if you are not clear on how to set them.

I highly recommend you use the SMART Model when setting goals

Specific
Measurable
Action-oriented
Realistic
Time based

You also want to write the goal as if it has already happened


EXAMPLE:
A poorly written goal is: I want to lose weight

A SMART Goal is: It is now December 31st 2012 and I weigh 65 kg's. I perform half an hour of cardio training and half an hour of strength training 5 days per week, and I feel fantastic.


3. CREATE NEW RITUALS
I picked up this tip from watching a short clip on goal setting by Tony Robbins. You can check it out here.

Look at where you are now, and ask yourself 'What rituals (or habits) have got me to this place?" Then think about where you want to be, and ask yourself "What rituals or habits will get me there?"

You see, if you want different results, you are going to have to start doing things differently. Makes sense right?

Ponder these questions

What new habits do you need to create?
+ What habits do you need to let go of?
+ What do you need to do differently?
+ What rituals will take you where you want to go?
+ What rituals will take you away from where you want to go?


4. MAKE A VISION BOARD
A vision board can be created on a pinboard using photos, pictures or images from magazines. Or it can be done on your computer using a slide show of photos or images or using a program such as Picassa.

Rather than explaining the how to create one of these magical little tools, I thought you might like to see how these amazing ladies are doing it;

+ Jess Ainscough from Wellness Warrior gives an awesome step by step guide here
+ Denisse Duffield Thomas from Lucky Bitch explains it so well here 
+ Rachel Magahy from In Spaces Between has a beautiful example here

Then, once you have your vision board, place it in an area where you will see it daily. Repetition is key. Whenever you look at it imagine yourself living a life where all these dreams have already come true. Connect with the feeling of having it on a daily basis.


5. LET GO
Here is the clincher.

After working hard to create your goals, make your vision board and take lots of new actions, no doubt you will be wanting some return for all your efforts. But here is one thing you must find a way to do, and that is let go.

You have to loosen your grip on that outcome you want so desperately. You have to take a deep breath and relax about where you are. The more you watch and wait and become impatient about whether or not your results are coming, the more you are going to get in the way of their manifestation.

Instead cultivate a calm expectation. A knowing. A strong sense of belief that these dreams you desire are on their way to you. Know they are done.

When you set your goals with a sense of certainty, you can afford to wait for their manifestation, because it is not about IF they are coming. It is simply about WHEN.

So just chill out. Be light hearted and playful about it all. Love where you are now and enjoy all the fabulous things that are already great about you and your life. When you give off an energy of happiness and a feeling of already being complete, the Universe cannot help but bring you even more to make you feel happy about.


Now over to you...

In 2012, one of my goals is to connect with YOU, my reader, even more. So, I would love to hear from you.

+ What goals have you set for 2012?
+ What steps will you be taking to achieve them?

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